SEX on the first date? How long to wait before “sealing the deal”.
One of the biggest debates, when it comes to dating, is how long should you wait before sleeping with someone for the first time. Some age-old recommendations range from 3 dates to 90 days, to all the way up until your wedding night. I’m not here to tell you what to do or how long to wait, but rather help you explore what would be the right choice for you
Let me start off by saying that I think it’s totally unfair that women even have to worry about this stuff. Getting intimate with a new person is already so anxiety-inducing! As if worrying about how you’ll look naked wasn’t enough, you also have to think about how you’ll be perceived if you sleep with someone “too soon”. It totally sucks, to be honest. But, you can only control how you feel about your choices and what’s going to make you happy, so let’s dive into how to approach your next sexy situation.
WHAT DOES HAVING SEX MEAN TO YOU?
Think about the meaning you place on sex. Is sex something that you consider to be super personal? Do you associate sex with being in love? Then, you should probably wait until you are committed to someone with a deeper emotional connection.
Do you think sex is purely physical and something you can do with anyone you’re attracted to? Do you find it to be fun and you’re okay sleeping with someone you’re not committed to? Then, you might be more comfortable getting intimate early on.
There’s no right answer, but stay honest with yourself. (We’re more emotional than we like to admit sometimes, LOL)
CONSIDER YOUR LONG-TERM DATING GOALS
Are you trying to date casually or looking to create something more serious?
Unfortunately, men have a reputation of ending things after they have sex with a girl early on. We see it time and time again. Things are going great and the chemistry is there, but then after sex, things change and he disappears. If you’re dating casually and plan on sleeping around (do you, girl!), then this is something you sometimes may have to suck up and deal with. Don’t hate the player, hate the game, ya know?
But, if you’re looking to find a partner, you might want to wait it out. Sometimes having sex too soon can cloud your judgement of a person. Getting intimate can sometimes create false emotions, ESPECIALLY if the sex was good. Maybe, try waiting it out just a little longer and making sure your emotions are real before jumping into bed.
ARE YOU FEELING PRESSURE?
If you’re feeling pressured by a guy to have sex, the answer is always NO. Make sure that the reason you’re having sex with someone is because the feeling is mutual. It doesn’t matter how much he spent on dinner or how many dates you’ve been on, you don’t owe anyone your body!
THERE ARE NO RULES
In conclusion, sex is a personal choice! Not every guy is the same and there is no single way to approach intimacy. Do what feels right, listen to your gut, and know that “the one” probably won’t care if you have sex on the first night or the 100th night.
BONUS TIP: If there’s no condom, there’s no sex! Stay safe out there.
Thanks for reading!
xo KP